Adulting: Still Waiting for the Manual (Indian Edition)

A desi take on how nobody really knows what they're doing, despite what aunty ji thinks

Remember when you were a bachcha and thought adults had it all figured out? That somewhere between 10th boards and getting your first job, someone would hand you "The Complete Guide to Being a Proper Indian Adult" - complete with chapters on when to get married, how to handle relatives' questions, and the ancient art of making round rotis?

Well, plot twist: That manual was probably lost somewhere between Independence and the IT boom. And if it exists, it's definitely written by some uncle who thinks WhatsApp forwards are news.

Education - The Great Marks Race

Our education system prepared us for everything except... well, life. We can solve complex trigonometry problems but can't figure out how to file our own PAN card application. We memorized the periodic table but nobody taught us how to negotiate with auto drivers or understand EMIs.

I realized this when my neighbor's 8-year-old asked me what I studied, and after saying "Engineering," he immediately asked, "But uncle, why are you not in America?" Even kids know the script better than we do.

The truth? Half of us chose engineering because "beta, scope hai," and the other half chose it because our parents filled out the application form. Now we're all "software engineers" who spend our days in meetings discussing things that could have been emails.

Sports and the Great Indian Dream

Every Indian parent wants their child to be the next Sachin or Saina, but only after they become a doctor or engineer first. We grew up playing gully cricket with elaborate rules ("Ball goes to terrace, you're out!") and football with stones as goalposts.

Now as adults, our biggest sporting achievement is climbing three flights of stairs without getting breathless, or successfully completing a morning walk without getting distracted by street food. We watch IPL religiously and argue about team strategies while struggling to touch our own toes.

Friends - The WhatsApp Warriors

Remember when friendship meant sharing tiffin and cycling to school together? Now our deepest conversations happen in WhatsApp groups named "College Gang" where we share good morning messages and argue about whose turn it is to plan the reunion that never happens.

We have three types of friends: school friends who remember when you were weird, college friends who know your secrets, and work friends who pretend to laugh at your boss's jokes with you. All of them will eventually ask you to like their spouse's business page on Facebook.

Love in the Time of Arranged-cum-Love

Bollywood taught us that love meant dancing around trees and fighting 10 villains for your beloved. Reality taught us that love means finding someone whose Netflix preferences match yours and whose family doesn't ask too many questions about your salary.

We have "love marriages" that started on matrimonial sites and "arranged marriages" where the couple chatted on WhatsApp for six months first. The lines are so blurred that even we don't know which category we fall into anymore.

Marriage - The Great Indian Wedding Circus

Nothing prepares you for Indian wedding planning. You'll spend more time discussing the catering menu than you did choosing your life partner. Relatives you've never met will have strong opinions about your mehendi design, and someone will definitely comment that weddings were simpler "in our time."

The best part? After all the drama, photos, and dance performances, married life is basically the same as being single, except now you have to coordinate your Amazon deliveries and someone judges your choice of breakfast cereal.

Family - The Original Reality TV Show

Indian families are the ultimate ensemble cast where everyone has an opinion about everyone else's life choices. Your career decisions will be debated in family WhatsApp groups, your weight changes will be monitored by distant aunties, and your marriage timeline will be discussed more than the Union Budget.

We master the art of selective listening during family gatherings - nodding at unsolicited advice while mentally planning our escape to the nearest corner with good WiFi.

Happiness - The Moving Goalpost

First it was "get good marks, then you'll be happy." Then "get into good college." Then "get good job." Then "get married." Then "buy house." Then "have kids." The goalposts keep moving faster than our ability to reach them.

Meanwhile, our happiest moments are often the simplest ones - finding a good dosa place, getting through traffic without honking, or successfully explaining to our parents why we don't want to join their morning laughter club.

Children - Mini Mes with Maximum Drama

Having kids means you finally understand why your parents said "wait until you have your own children." These tiny humans will question your authority while simultaneously being completely dependent on you for everything, including finding socks they're literally wearing.

Indian parenting is basically wondering if you should be stricter like your parents were or more liberal like you wished they had been, while your child plays Minecraft and speaks better English than you do.

Money - The Great Indian Middle-Class Struggle

We're the generation caught between "money can't buy happiness" and "₹50 extra for express delivery? That's too much." We budget carefully for months and then spend ₹2000 on food delivery because we're "too tired to cook."

Our relationship with money is complicated: we compare mutual fund returns while buying the cheapest vegetables, and we research phones for weeks before buying but will spend impulsively on "limited time offers."

Jobs - The IT Chronicles

Half of India works in IT, and the other half pretends to understand what the first half does. We attend "scrum meetings" and talk about "bandwidth" while our parents tell people we "work with computers."

Office politics here involves navigating who brought homemade lunch to share, whose birthday cake cutting you have to attend, and how to politely decline invitations to colleagues' house-warming ceremonies.

Politics - The WhatsApp University Graduates

We're all political experts now, thanks to WhatsApp forwards and Twitter threads. Family WhatsApp groups have become debate forums where uncles share "important news" and everyone else practices the art of strategic silence.

The real skill is navigating political conversations at family gatherings without offending anyone while secretly checking fact-checking websites under the table.

Travel - Instagram vs Reality

We plan trips based on Instagram potential and end up spending more time taking photos than actually experiencing places. "Let's go to Goa" usually means "let's recreate those beach photos we saw online."

Indian travel stories always include: getting lost because we trusted Google Maps more than locals, finding the one South Indian restaurant in North India, and that one friend who overpacked for a weekend trip.

The Beautiful Indian Truth

Here's what I've learned from our desi adulting experience: Everyone is just trying to balance tradition with modernity while pretending they know the difference between mutual funds and fixed deposits.

That uncle who seems successful? He's probably still asking his wife to handle all the bank work. The aunty with perfect kids? Her children WhatsApp her to ask how to boil eggs. The cousin with the great job? They're googling "how to talk to boss about salary increment" like the rest of us.

We're all just trying to be good Indians while figuring out what that even means in 2025. We want to respect our parents' values while creating our own, earn in rupees while dreaming in dollars, and maintain relationships while building careers.

The Conclusion (Or, What We're All Really Doing)

So here's to all of us desi adults - the engineering graduates working in marketing, the arranged-love-marriage couples, the family WhatsApp group survivors, and the people still trying to make perfect round rotis.

We may not have received the manual, but we're creating our own version - one that includes equal parts tradition and rebellion, family obligations and personal dreams, and definitely more masala than any Western manual could handle.

And honestly? Our improvised version is probably more entertaining anyway. At least it comes with better food and stronger family support systems, even if they come with unsolicited advice.

P.S. If anyone finds the real Indian adulting manual, it's probably with that relative who knows exactly when you should get married, what job you should have, and why you're not eating enough vegetables. Good luck getting it from them.

---

What's your most "only in India" adulting moment? Share your stories in the comments - we're all figuring out this beautiful chaos together, one family gathering at a time.

India at the Crossroads: The Revolution That Was and Wasn't

We are often told that India’s economic growth is a modern marvel, a story of explosive progress and a new global order. But what if we're missing the bigger picture? What if, in our haste to celebrate the gains, we've overlooked a far greater potential—a trillion-dollar revolution that we have, for all our ambition, missed?

This is the intellectual terrain I explore in my book, India at a Crossroads: The Trillion Dollar Missed Revolution. This isn't a critique born of pessimism, but an examination rooted in a fundamental question: Is our current path truly sustainable, or are we repeating the same cycles of economic and social policy that have held us back for generations?

The book dissects the paradoxes of modern India. We are a nation capable of sending rockets to Mars, yet we struggle to build and maintain fundamental urban infrastructure. We have world-class technology hubs, yet our small and medium-sized enterprises (SMEs), the true engines of employment and innovation, are hobbled by bureaucracy and a lack of access to capital. We speak of a "demographic dividend," yet we continue to underskill our youth, turning a potential strength into a looming liability.

The "trillion-dollar missed revolution" is not an abstract concept; it is the untapped potential of a decentralized, democratized economic model. It is the wealth we could create by moving beyond top-down mandates and embracing a system where every district, town, and village becomes a self-sustaining economic powerhouse.

This revolution requires a shift in mindset—from grand, centralized projects to granular, local innovation. It demands that we empower entrepreneurs, streamline governance, and, most importantly, redefine our understanding of progress. Is true progress merely a rising GDP number, or is it a society where dignity, opportunity, and prosperity are accessible to all?

India at a Crossroads is an argument for a different future. It is a roadmap to a more resilient, equitable, and ultimately more prosperous India, a nation that finally realizes its full, monumental potential.

Buy your copy here on Amazon (International Readers)

Buy Your Copy on Pothi.com (Indian Readers)

Beyond the Bang: Why Are We Here?

From a philosophical perspective, the question of our cosmic origins is a profound journey into the nature of existence itself. We can approach it by contemplating the relationship between the universe, consciousness, and humanity's place within the grand cosmic narrative.

The Universe: A Symphony of Becoming

The universe did not "form" in a static sense; it is a continuous process of becoming. The prevailing scientific theory of the Big Bang suggests that all of space, time, matter, and energy emerged from a single, unimaginably hot and dense point approximately 13.8 billion years ago. But this is not merely a physical event. Philosophically, we can view it as the singular point of potential from which all subsequent reality unfolded.

From Singularity to Complexity: The Big Bang was the "let there be light" moment, but the emergence of consciousness was a long, slow process. The initial universe was a soup of fundamental particles—quarks and electrons. Over billions of years, these particles cooled and coalesced into atoms, which formed stars and galaxies. Within the hearts of these stars, heavier elements like carbon, oxygen, and iron were forged. When these stars died in colossal supernova explosions, they scattered their "stardust" across the cosmos. This is the material from which we, and everything around us, are made. We are, quite literally, children of the stars.

Our Cosmic Home: The Accidental Oasis

Our home, Earth, is not a coincidence but a product of cosmic probabilities. In the vastness of the universe, our planet represents a rare convergence of conditions necessary for life. It is the "Goldilocks Zone" of existence: not too hot, not too cold, with a liquid water, a stable atmosphere, and a protective magnetic field.

The Philosophical Question: Did we come to be on this planet by pure chance, or is there a deeper, underlying principle at play? Some philosophical perspectives suggest that the universe is inherently creative, with an innate drive toward greater complexity and consciousness. In this view, the emergence of life and intelligent beings is not an accident but a natural, perhaps inevitable, consequence of the universe’s fundamental laws.

Humanity: The Universe Contemplating Itself

This brings us to the most profound part of the story: us. We are the unique point in this cosmic narrative where the universe has, for the first time, become aware of itself. Through our consciousness, we can ask questions about our origins, explore the stars, and ponder the very laws that brought us into being. We are the universe’s way of reflecting on its own majesty and mystery.

Consciousness as a Cosmic Mirror: We are not separate from the universe; we are an expression of it. Our minds are a microcosm of the cosmos, capable of containing and contemplating its vastness. The journey from the Big Bang to the human brain is the ultimate evolutionary tale, transforming inert matter into conscious awareness. It is a story that reveals the universe not as a cold, random machine, but as a living, breathing entity that is always evolving, always becoming.

The Unvarnished Truth: Why Your Restaurant Dream Will Likely "Curry Up and Go Broke"

You dream of culinary glory, don't you? The sizzle of a perfect dish, the clinking of glasses, the rave reviews. You picture yourself as the next great restaurateur, your passion transforming into profit. Stop. Just stop right there. Because the reality of the Indian food industry is a visceral, brutal punch to the gut, and unless you understand its unforgiving nature, your dream will almost certainly Curry Up and Go Broke.

In my book of the same name, Curry Up and Go Broke: A Satirical Guide to the Indian Restaurant Business, from Startup to Pauperdom, I tear down the romantic illusions with a vengeance. This isn't some fluffy motivational guide. This is a battle plan for survival in an arena designed to crush you.

I’ve been in the trenches. I’ve felt the grease, tasted the sweat, and seen the despair in the eyes of countless entrepreneurs whose passion was devoured by a system rigged against them. From crippling lease agreements that are financial bear traps to municipal fees that bleed you dry, every step is fraught with peril. And then, the ultimate predator: the food delivery aggregators.

They promise you customers, they promise you reach. What they deliver is a slow, agonizing death by a thousand cuts. Their "pathological hatred of margins" traps you in a cycle of insane discounts and crippling commissions, turning your culinary art into a commodity. Your unique flavors become irrelevant; all that matters is the next promo code. Loyalty? It’s a myth sold by Silicon Valley, evaporating with the next cheaper option.

This book is a scream of frustration, a stark warning, and ultimately, a lifeline. It’s for anyone audacious enough to consider opening a restaurant in India, or for those already caught in its merciless grip. If you’re not ready to face the raw, unvarnished truth, if you prefer comforting lies to brutal facts, then don't read this book. But if you're prepared to strip away the illusions, to confront the economic impossible, and perhaps, just perhaps, find a way to defy the odds, then Curry Up and Go Broke is your essential, unromanticized guide to not just surviving, but understanding the fight of your life.

You can find the book on Amazon here: Curry Up and Go Broke on Amazon 

Buy it on Pothi.com for Indian Readers here: Curry Up and Go Broke 

Beyond Thought: The Evolution of Manifestation from Myth to Modernity

In a world saturated with information and noise, how do we cut through the chaos to create what we truly desire? In my book, Beyond Thought: The Evolution of Manifestation in Modernity, I explore this very question.

We often believe that thinking harder, planning more meticulously, or simply wishing for something is enough. But what if the true power of creation lies not in our thoughts, but beyond them?

Beyond Thought is a deep dive into the fascinating space where human consciousness meets reality. It’s an exploration of how the act of bringing something into existence has evolved from ancient myths and rituals to the high-speed, hyper-connected world of today. This isn’t just another guide on positive thinking; it’s a philosophical and practical journey that challenges our most basic assumptions about what it means to create.

I argue that true manifestation is a dynamic process, a dance between intention and action. It requires a shift from a purely intellectual approach to one that integrates our intuition, emotional intelligence, and a deep understanding of the world around us. The book delves into how you can cultivate this state of being, leveraging modern tools and a timeless wisdom.

If you’ve ever felt stuck, overwhelmed, or like your biggest dreams are just beyond your grasp, Beyond Thought is for you. It's an invitation to step off the hamster wheel of endless thinking and into a more fluid, powerful way of living and creating.

You can find the book on Amazon here: 

Buy Beyond Thought: The Evolution of Manifestation from Myth to Modernity on Amazon (Rest of the world)

Buy on Pothi.com (India)